I was 12 when I was married to older man. Raped and gave birth to a son a year later. This is my story of why it needs to stop.
A girl being married off at a young age is normal in my culture and although it is illegal in many countries now and things have started to change, it still happens all the time, I was one of those girls.
At 12 years old I was still a child, I watched cartoons and I played with dolls, I was a tiny girl without a care or worry in the world, happy and enjoying being a kid, then my dad, who had been separated from my mom for a while, showed up on my 12th birthday and told me I was getting married a week later and it had already been arranged.
My mom protested and tried to stop it from happening, but dad had custody of me that week, ordered by the courts, mom even went to the police but it was out of their hands, the following week my dad came and got me and he took me to another country, I was excited because it was my first time on a plane and I thought it was a holiday, I didn’t properly understand what was about to happen.
The day after we arrived I was given special clothes to wear, I put them on and felt like a princess, then dad drove me to a party and introduced me to a man, he was 41 years old, dad told me I was going to marry him today, I still didn’t understand but was excited to be the attention of the party, I felt really special.
We had a ceremony and I said what I was told to say, then the man kissed me and I went all shy, he told me he loved me and that he was happy I was picked for him.
In my culture you can be married at 12 but you have to wait until you are 15 before consummating the marriage, that didn’t happen.
After the party my dad left me with the man and said I would be going home with him, I was nervous but dad reassured me I would be fine and he would come and see me in the morning, so the man drove me home and showed me where I would be staying, we went in to a bedroom that was festively decorated for the occasion and he closed the door.
He started to remove his clothes and I asked him why, he said he was going to love me and told me to get undressed, I was confused and still nervous but did it because he was older and I wanted to be a good girl and do as I was told, I saw him fully undress and saw his penis, it was big, he got under the bed covers while I finished undressing, then asked me to join him in the bed.
He held me for a while, it was okay and I was warm, then he took my hand and placed it on his penis and told me to rub it for him, I rubbed it and it got bigger and very hard, I was scared when he touched me between my legs, he kissed me and then rolled over and sat up by my feet, I saw his penis, it was huge now, big, black and veiny, it was at least 9 inches long, I asked him what he was doing, he said he was going to love me now.
He lay between my open legs and put his big hairy arms around my back, I screamed and cried when he tried to force his penis inside me, it really hurt because I wasn’t ready for this, my body was tiny, my hole was far too small for the huge size of his penis, I asked him to stop, then he got violent, demanding I behave and give him what belongs to him, he told me I was his wife and it was his right to have me.
He literally forced his penis inside me, I could feel blood dripping out of me, his penis pushing my hips apart as it stretched my delicate insides beyond their current limits, he held me down and raped me forcefully, all I wanted was my mom, I didn’t understand why my dad would leave me alone with this man knowing he was going to hurt me like this.
He raped me several times that night and I slept in my own blood and tears.
The next day I waited and waited, but dad never came for me, I was alone, and the man raped me every night for a week, even though I was in horrible pain he made me cook and clean for him as well.
Dad did eventually come for me and he took me back home to mom, I held her so tight and cried for days in her arms, I had gotten pregnant, mom tried to get me an abortion but dad and the horrible man who was meant to be my husband went to the courts and blocked it from happening, nine months later I had my first child, a boy.
My husband, the demon man, came to live here and moved me and his son in to his house, I was continually raped, almost every day, forced to bare his children until I had my seventh child, then he stopped.
Forced marriage is not good, children shouldn’t be forced to get married and have children of their own at such a young age, it is horrible and outdated. I have three daughters myself now and there’s no way I would allow it to happen to them.
Can you imagine your daughter going through this. Love them and protect them.
Let them be girls, not victims and mothers.